A Synonymous Tune... A Whisper of Melodrama to your Ears

Lee Soo Young - Because I Miss You, Because Tears Fall

I see you past the crumbled time
Though I tell myself I can’t reach you,
I touch you with the tips of my two hands.

I ask my own empty heart and I answer by myself,
If you loved me, that I love you, forever, like the first time.

Because I miss you, because I miss you like I’ll explode,
I will pretend not to hear separation and will hide my bitter heart,
Even if the blind memories coldly pass me by without seeing me,
Will I be able to recognize you?

Even if it didn’t heal, I cried to the point where it got dull,
But why does it hurt, why is it sad? I can’t even hate you.

Because I miss you, because I miss you like I’ll explode,
I will pretend not to hear separation and will hide my bitter heart,
Even if the blind memories coldly pass me by without seeing me,
I would recognize you.

If you see me changed, I’m afraid you will hurt,
That you will stop on your way here, that you will hate me,
So I will always be standing with the face you’ve always seen.

Because tears fall, even if I smile, my throat clams up,
So I will pretend not to know separation and only call your name,
Because even if my foolish longing makes my days harder,
I can’t erase you, because I’m a fool.

 P/s: the lyrics, it's so similar that it makes me cry & grin at the same time...:-') it's available to download from this blog...

Sing, sing along~

geu dae ga bo yeo yo bu seo jin jeo si gan neo meo

dah eur su nan eopt da hae do du son kkeut eu ro geu daer man jyeo yo

teong bin ga seum ga deug na hon ja mut go hon ja dap hae yo

sa rang haet nya go sa rang han da go yeong won hi cheo eum cheo reom

na geu ri wo seo teo jir deus geu dae geu ri wo seo

i byeor geu reon geo mos deur eun cheog si rin mam gam chul geo jyo

nun meon chu eog i nar mos bon chae cha gap ge seu chyeo ga do

geu daer ar a bor su iss eu ni kka

a mul jin mot hae do mu dyeo jir man keum deo ur eot neun de

wae a peun geon ji wae seul peun geon ji mi wo do mot har sa ram

na geu ri wo seo teo jir deus geu dae geu ri wo seo

i byeor geu reon geo mos deur eun cheog si rin mam gam chul geo jyo

nun meon chu eog i nar mos bon chae cha gap ge seu chyeo ga do

geu daer ar a bor ten de

byeon han na reur bo myeon a peul kka bwa o da meom chul kka bwa nae ga mi ul kka bwa

neur bo deon pyo jeong ha na ro neur seo iss eul kke

na nun mul na seo ut go iss eo do mog i me seo

i byeor geu reon geo mo reu neun cheog geu dae man bu reul geo jyo

mi ryeon ga deuk han geu ri um i ha ru deo him gyeo wo do

geu daer ji ur su ga eops eu ni kka

geu reon ba bo ni kka

(thanks to: http://parkrarin.blogspot.com)

Because I Miss You, Because Tears Fall (GHOST OST)

~Dedicated Love~

1 weeks passed, and I already felt like I'm missing that certain person every day.  But got to remain tough, as I don't want any unnecessary casualties to became deja vu after I tried so hard to resolve our problems.  Need to remain firm on my stand of not disturbing the tranquility of my inner emotions.

<li shengshun, 3.12 a.m., 16th January 2013>

~Seven Swells of Dented Heart~

<li shengshun, 4.21 p.m., 25th January 2013>

A Thought of Passiveness, Enveloping a Dented Heart that Slowly Trying to Recover...

I've safely reached my hometown.  But, this is the time where I consider to be passive to my surroundings, considering the commotion that I had in Tanjung Malim.  So, this is not going to be a long entry either, but I'll accommodate all of my thoughts into this art.  Enjoy.

A Concluding Entry...Semester 5

Love, it can be mesmerizing & prickly simultaneously.  It’s pretty early for me to compose my semester 5 ending entry, but taking a rest from my very heavy major and minor exam which just concluded today, there’s literally 1 paper left.  However, I felt that everything needs to be resolved within the confinements of the white, virtual writing canvas known as word editor.  As seen on all my previous entries from September up until January 2013, there’s only 1 bugging issue that’s been hindering my motion all the time.  To separate it into components, I’m going to split this entry into a few sections: namely roommate, course mate, work, and finally HER.  So here it goes.

Want to talk about my roomate, I just don’t know how to describe them.  Horrible?  Obnoxious? Not even close enough.  As I thought the semester before that while I’m living alone in this spacious room, I’m really lonely without anyone to attend to.  Previously our relationship is not that strained, as I give in to everything that they felt comfortable to.  I’m willing to do housework, watching them partying around, laughing while I’m having depressing moments, it’s all that I could bear.  However, the thing needs to be stopped.  Remember 1 of my previous entry where I mentioned about 1 of them?  Having a major gaiety of immersing himself into same species preference?  He just got better.  I never expected it, but when he’s shouting on the phone and putting my stuff near pork products, I know that he’s just obnoxious of himself.  He read the entry, and literally apologized to me.  On FB.  The 1 message that I never opened up until today.  Gave him 2 months to apologize live to my face, but the words never come.  I guess, there’s people like that around.  This entry is not going to ostracize their presence, but I felt that I’m better off without them around, just like this very moment when I’m alone.  Somehow, I had already foreseen this storm coming, so I just maintain my silence while living with them these 2 months.  I sometimes hear them gossiping when I’m in the gents, or even using foreign languages that they perceive I couldn’t comprehend.  These experiences made me felt that, even if you expect that person would forge a bond with you in the future, you would never expect that they’re having hidden agenda lurking around that very noggin of them.  You could never expect how people think, although their act may seem varied.  Sometimes, you assume that you would be able to take those blows from them so long as you could harmonize with them, but they just keep on pushing you on the brink of the cliff waiting for you to snap and retreating back into seclusion.  I mean, I don’t really know what they are thinking at the moment.  How I’d be involved with this kind of people who seems so slack, it’s all in God’s planning.  Maybe someday He’ll shine out a path of resolution for me to choose.

Talking about course mates, there’s been a lot going on recently that this particular entry might just seem not be enough to relay it all.  For these 4 semesters that passed, I always expect that people are practicing a kind of ritual, some preference when they want to be friends with someone.  What I been through this semester, it really opened my outlook on life better.  Citing an example, when I told her friends about my feelings toward her.  The people that I told, they’re the very same that read my joyful, ending entry last semester.  After that entry, they keep on commenting about it online.  I thought that’s a good thing.  However, it became a reason that we literally split up, our relationship fractured to the point of awkwardness.  During these early semester 5, me and ***a’s relationship are getting more and more intimate, with me posting on her wall without caring about the observers on the cyber community.  It turned awful for her, when people keep on teasing my name with her.   When she keeps on posting status neglecting about our relationship, some of her pals are been defensive about her.  They mentioned me indirectly about some of my obvious acts, such as giving her presents and calling her “Dear” within the crowd.  This hurts me in the process.  One of her friend, *a****a asked me right after giving a harsh comment targeted towards me.  I told her every detail, not denying anything.  She gives me her opinion about the matter, while advising me to maintain my sanity to not embarrass ***a’s integrity as a woman.  

 I accepted her advice,